I made it home last night at 11:30 p.m. with a rolled ankle, empty McDonald’s bag and a duffle full of sweaty clothes. Did I cry when I left? Yes. But, I had a wonderful last weekend there.
In my last blog post, I mostly talked about the sad parts of this final weekend –– and there were sad moments and many “lasts.” But, there were fun, silly and light-hearted moments too. So, let’s talk about them.
Do you know what’s underrated? Knowing that you have enough money in your bank account to cover a few vodka sodas. I happily handed my credit card over to the bartender many times this weekend, rather than scrambling together dollar bills. Maybe living at home and saving money isn’t so bad.
Next, there is no feeling like being in a crowded bar, standing way too close to people you are sure are crop dusting you, and seeing a table become available. And on Friday, that very thing happened to me.
I was walking to the bathroom when I saw a group get up from one of the booths. No, not just any booth. I’m talking about the corner booth right next to the window that is a little sectioned off from the sea of standing people. I immediately ran to sit down at this table and texted my friends to come over. This made our night even more magnificent than it already was (and I had just eaten some really great mac and cheese that night, so that’s saying something).
Now, this one I know is a popular one, but a morning debrief never fails –– especially over bagels. Dressed in t-shirts and flip flops, my friends and I (all experiencing some form of hangover) stopped to get bagels and collected ourselves.
It felt like no time had passed since we had last been together. We laughed, talked about “Love Island” and nibbled at our bagels together. While I knew this would be our last weekend in State College together for a while, I pushed that thought out of my mind and embraced the simplicity of our morning.
I also saw a lot of my other friends out at the bars while I was there. It was fun to hear about the different jobs people were taking or what higher education options they were considering. But, the best moments were when both of us agreed that we had no idea what we were doing.
While living at home, it’s easy to forget that so many people are feeling the same things as me: lost, lonely and underqualified. It felt nice to be surrounded by people who are trying to figure things out the same way I am.
The nights lasted until the early morning, with pitchers of sweet drinks, zippers and lime slices cluttering the table. I squeezed my friends tight –– in digital camera photos and outside of them. All of us, grinning and making sad faces that this was our last weekend together for who knows how long. But, the fact that we were together was what really mattered.
Overall, this weekend I kept having this thought: it felt good to be known. Throughout the weekend, the song “dorothea” by Taylor Swift hummed in the back of my head, repeating the lyrics: “And if you’re ever tired of being known / For who you know / You know, you’ll always know me.”
Being home can be lonely sometimes. It doesn’t have the same comfort that my college town had. I used to see so many people walking to class, at the grocery store or at the bar. I would wave to them, say hi or give them a hug. Now, in my own hometown, there are so many strangers.
It was still sad to leave State College for the last time as a resident, but I know I will always know these people, and they will always know me. And I’m so grateful for that.
Let me know your thoughts, comments and questions by emailing me at gingerlyons23@gmail.com or typing down below.
Educated Guesses 